Thursday, June 25, 2009

Random crap patients feel the need to tell me...

So I've decided to sporadically add wonderful tidbits of TMI (Too Much Information) that patients feel the need to tell me while I'm at work. Here's the most recent that almost had me rolling on the floor. Scenario...patient is a diabetic who needs to bring in his first morning void (pee) so we can do a urinalysis, so the patient gets a cup with a lid at his previous visit to bring in with him at his next visit, this one is a month after his orientation visit:

Me: Mr. X, did you remember to bring in your first morning void this morning?
Mr. X: You betcha I did...do you want it?
Me: Um...no, when you go to the lab, you can give it to them since they will check the specimen?
Mr. X: How much was I supposed to fill it up? Because you never told me how much to fill up the cup...
Me: If you filled up the cup about half way, then that's perfect. They just need enough to run a dipstick test to check for blood and protein in your urine.
Mr. X: Well, I filled it up to the top. And lemme tell ya, I tried to stop, and god darn it my kidneys just wouldn't quit! I could've fill up another couple of cups for ya, at least a good 3 ta 4 more...
Me: No, one cup is sufficient, Mr. X. But thanks for the offer...

Maybe it's just me, but crap like this cracks me up...yeah, don't need 5 urine cups from you, sorry...lol. Oh well...welcome to a day in the life...

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